Thursday 13 October 2011

Making a difference one life at a time through Hospice


Courtney Taylor
Cariboo Advisor
Some people search their whole life for their calling; to find something in life that they were meant to do.

It certainly didn’t take Wendy Stasica her whole life the find her calling, but she’ll admit she needed a little push in the right direction.

Ten years ago Stasica was working in the mailroom at the Tribune, and now she is the Volunteer Services Coordinator at the Central Cariboo Hospice.

“I use to think it was kind of an accident how I ended up here,” said Stasica.

She recalls thinking back to when she was young, visiting her mom in the hospital when she was just 14 years old. She says she recalls trying to help an elderly lady in the bed across from her mom who was moaning and groaning.

“I knew she wanted something, and I did the best I could to try and figure it out,” said Stascia. “She held my hand and slowly drifted off to sleep, like she felt better just knowing someone was there.”

Flash forward to the fall of 2001, and Stasica is working in the mailroom at the Tribune, and has the opportunity to go down to Abbotsford to visit a co-worker who was diagnosed with cancer and was dying.

Before Stasica saw Diane in the hospital, another friend warned her of how she looked, and about the smell in the room.

“I walked in the room and the smell was indeed awful and she didn’t look the same, she looked like she was dying, but within a couple of minutes that all went away and it didn’t matter.”

Stasica recalls getting very angry at the nurse because she noticed there was no one coming into the room to check on her friend.

She was told that the nurses were having a hard time going in the room because Diane was quite young. Stasica said she told them she didn’t care about the staff and told them they should be at least going in and pretending to do something.

“There are still things you can do to comfort the person even if you can’t save them,” said Stasica.

So she stayed with her friend for three days and sung songs and lullabies and things like that. She says she didn’t really know what she was doing - she just had an overwhelming need to comfort her.

After Diane passed away, Stasica was thanked by her mom for helping Diane feel better, something Stasica didn’t know she had done, but she also thanked the family for allowing her to help Diane because she now knew what she wanted to do for a career.

As soon as she was back home she quit her job and went straight to the Deni House and asked if she could visit with anyone who needed visiting.

“I told them to give me the worst, give me the ones nobody wants,” said Stasica. “Give me the ones who have nobody, those are the ones that maybe I can help.”

It wasn’t long before Stasica had to go back to her job, she could only last so long without pay, but she was volunteering during the day.

After a couple of months the woman she had been paired up with passed away and Stasica went to the funeral and contacted the family and told them how much she had liked their mom.

“I found I fit in the environment,” said Stasica. “I was of service and that’s what I wanted to feel.”

One of the women at Deni House told Stasica that she should do hospice work, and when Stasica asked what hospice was she was told that they only deal with people who are dying.

“I thought ‘that’s where I should be,” said Stasica.

“I went straight to the hospice office and asked for an application to be a volunteer.”

A week before her training was done, Stasica’s dad passed away unexpectedly and she was not allowed to sit with any clients.

“And that broke my heart,” said Stasica. “At the time, they felt that I needed time to deal with my lose before I could help others.”

Stasica said she has since changed that thought.

As it was, she ended up helping Kate McDonough, the executive director, with assessments and arranging the volunteers.

“And I’ve been in this position ever since.’

Stasica did the job as a volunteer for three years while working nights at the mailroom at the Tribune.

“There were some days I was changing my clothes while on the phone in the office,” said Stasica.

Stasica said seven years ago, funding was found to make her position into a paying one, and she is paid six hours a day, but says she stays for as long as she is needed.

“She is a part-time staff, but works all hours and is totally dedicated to our clients,” said McDonough. 

“She has definitely made a huge difference in many people’s lives.”

Stasica says the job is a little more than she bargained for in the beginning, but that it’s turned out.

“It does feel good to be of service, and what more can you ask for than to have made a difference in someone’s life,” said Stasica.

As volunteer services coordinator, Stasica meets with all the clients, writes the assessment, and arranges all the volunteers, but she says she wishes she could spend more time with the clients.

“When I retire, I am going to be a hospice volunteer.”

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